10 Things That Happen When You Learn to Love Yourself

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Fall 2025

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You cannot give what you don’t have. Love is a strong emotion, and sometimes, with your best interest in mind, you might try to enter a relationship, only to see it fall apart. Have you ever asked yourself why? 

The simple reason is that the love you have “out there” reflects the love you experience “in here,” i.e., within yourself.  If you don’t love yourself enough, you won’t be able to love someone else. 

Have you ever wondered what happens when you learn to love yourself? For starters, you open a world of opportunities, and amazing things could happen to you when you learn to love yourself first. Below, are 10 miracles that happen in dating and relationships when you learn to love yourself first.

You Choose Someone Who Loves You Like You Want to Be Loved

Genuine love differs from other forms of attraction; that’s why when you learn to love yourself, you are more prone to find someone with whom you establish a long-term relationship. You are less likely to experience the shenanigans of the on-and-off dating relationships. 

Your Partner Embraces and Adores All of You

When you love yourself enough, your partner loves you more purely for who you are. He or she likes you with your faults, and you would likely do the same. Because you love yourself enough, you don’t feel compelled to make changes within yourself for others.

Your Dating Life or Relationship is Happier

When you have a balanced amount of self-love, it contributes to two essential qualities for your well-being: inner contentment and peace. These two qualities are the secret of all successful relationships, allowing you to use the same principles and practices to create or find genuine love. 

You Feel More Secure in Looking for or Being in Love

When you have a sufficient amount of self-love, you are not anxious about being loved or finding love because you know you are lovable. If a relationship doesn’t work out with this partner, you know that you can find it with someone else because you learned how to generate love inside yourself and give it as well.

You Don’t Feel Much is Missing

When you feel loved, your cup runs over; it’s full to the brim with good feelings and intentions. That in itself allows you not to focus on the fear of missing out on finding a partner; you are more likely to find one if you are single.

Your Partner Validates You

When you love yourself enough, you don’t ignore your feelings or emotions or brush them aside. That type of validation is important for your self-esteem. After all, you don’t need someone to tell you that you are good, worthy, or lovable, because your partner validates your life experience, too.

Your Life and Happiness are your Own

Because you love yourself enough, you don’t need to depend on someone else to make you happy; instead, you know in your heart of hearts that no one can be your Prince or Princess Charming. This feeling on its own lets you off the hook big time.

You Don’t Take Negativity 

When someone disrespects your boundaries, whether by rude behavior or other signs of toxic relationships, you don’t simply let go; instead, you effectively communicate your needs to your partner, because you know that you deserve to be treated with love and respect. When you set your boundaries straight, you are more confident in walking away from relationships that were once a good fit but are no longer. 

Your Partner Treats You Like Gold

Because kindness and forgiveness are essential qualities that you have repeatedly offered to yourself and others, your partner notices that and is more prone to treat you in the same way. After all, you treasure yourself, and hence, they treasure you too.

Your Perspective Shifts from Gloom to Growth 

Rather than dwelling on your misery, you dwell on all that’s positive and good. Why? Because you love yourself enough to know that the relationship between your partner and you is a mirror of the relationship between you and you. That’s why, when there is a disconnect somewhere, you are more likely to look inside yourself rather than judge others or assume the worst of yourself or your partner. 

David Messiha | Staff Writer

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